Monday, February 15, 2016

Sober Living Takes Time but Starts with a Decision


If you’re thinking about getting sober, you might be daunted by the idea of changing your life. You might know that you want the change because of the uncomfortable circumstances that addiction brings. At the same time, you might feel fear, stress, anxiety, or even emotional turmoil about the changes you want to make. Transforming your life is worrisome for anyone, regardless of the type of change. Fortunately, sober living takes time. You can move into it slowly. You can gradually get closer and closer to the life you want. But one thing is clear, before any of this happens, you need to make a decision. You have to decide that this is the direction you’re going. Sober living is possible, but you must know you want it. 

Most people are familiar with getting sober abruptly. You start going to AA meetings, get a sponsor, and you work the 12-steps. You stop drinking and using drugs. You stop drinking one day at a time until you’ve created an entire lifestyle of sober living. This has worked for millions of people. At the same time, there are other methods of getting sober which are less immediate. A lesser known model of sobriety is harm reduction. It helps a person get sober slowly by gradually reducing the level of harm substance use is creating. For instance, if you’re getting drunk every day perhaps you’re first goal is drinking only 4 times per week instead of all seven. Or your goal might be to drink nonalcoholic drinks for 3 of the 7 days you’re drinking each week. Or your goal might be to smoke cigarettes instead of marijuana. With harm reduction, slowly reducing the amount of your drinking or drug use can begin the process of sober living.

Yet, you might know that harm reduction isn’t going to work for you. You might know from the beginning that in order to live soberly, you’ll need to do it completely. Maybe you know that if you hang on to drinking or drug use of any amount, you’re going to keep living the same harmful lifestyle. It’s true that some people want to make the change quickly. They’re ready to be sober today. 

Regardless of how you get sober, sober living begins with a choice. Even if you don’t feel ready to do it today but you want to, all you need is a decision. Once you decide, then your choices can begin to grow out of that. Sure, even if you make the decision to get sober, it doesn’t mean that you’re going to stay sober for the rest of your life. You might relapse. You might even forget about your decision. But in some way, when you stay connected to the light of your decision inside, albeit small right now, you can find your way to sober living again and again.

And the number one thing that all recovering addicts need, whether they’re working on harm reduction or abstinence, is support. Once you’ve made the decision to get sober, go out there and find the support you need. Call a therapist, attend AA groups, and gather your friends around you. Once you’re clear that you want sober living, find the community of friends and family who will help you create just that.